Aaaaand, we have meds! These lovelies arrived the other day. I couldn’t resist spreading the whole lot out to see what all we’re working with here.


On Saturday evening, the day before I was to begin my EPP, I realized the pharmacy had sent me two bottles of Estrace–a 1mg bottle to be taken vaginally and a 2 mg bottle to begin taking orally! Maybe the clinic told me which one to begin taking initially or not, I truly don’t remember. This predicament turned into a first-thing-in-the-morning frantic phone call to the clinic on Sunday to ask what I should take. After three hours with no return phone call I called back again, only this time got the answering service. By this point, it’s noontime and I should’ve taken my estrogen in the morning so I’m getting kinda pissy. Finally they call me back to tell me to take the oral meds, which I do immediately after hanging up. I wasn’t a fan of the unnecessary last minute drama, but at least they called back and it’s over with. Whew.

AF is due on Saturday, but a combination of various symptoms and a drop in my temp makes me think she’ll be here Wednesday or Thursday instead. Which would be lovely actually, as a weekend AF equals a longer driving time to get to the clinic’s only location that’s open weekends for u/s and BW and is nowhere near my house.

Meantime I’m trying very hard not to think about the beginning of this first IVF cycle too much. Every time I walk past my box of stims I realize how real this all is. I moved the box to an out of the way place for the time being. It’s like I’m suddenly tempted to cancel the whole cycle. It all comes down to fear of the unknown, fear of it not working, fear of needles (which I already have to a frightening degree—yay!), and fear of how stupidly, throbbingly painful that box of terrors will make my ovary. This is like diving off a cliff, so I just plain won’t.think.about.it. We’ve put so much thought and time and energy and emotion and money into IF and IF treatment already that I’m just taking a step back at this last minute and trying to just do what I gotta do and get it over with.

One of my fave expressions: “This too shall pass.” Amen.


Author: Marixsa

Resolving infertility as childless-not-by-choice and encouraging fellow endo warriors along the way.

One thought on “Takeoff”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.


Pleasant words are as a honeycomb: sweet to the soul and health to the bones. - Proverbs 16:24

Childless by Marriage

In a society where most people have kids, some of us don't because our partners are unable or unwilling to make babies. That's what this blog and my book, Childless by Marriage, are about. Let's talk about what it's really like.

The joy in small things

Parenting and everything else after infertility

Thinking to Believe

An Oasis for Thoughtful Christians

Surprised By Marriage

Sharing the struggles an

The State Of Being Sober

Margot's Movement. A journey of sobriety and saying no to the Sauvignon. Once, and for all.

Discover WordPress

A daily selection of the best content published on WordPress, collected for you by humans who love to read.

Christine Seifert

Lady professor by day. Reader by night. Sometimes I write books.

The Good, The Bad and the Stuff Inbetween

This is a first hand account of my journey through IVF and life beyond

Sparkly With Endo

A journey to find my sparkle while living with endometriosis

Anne Brock

A Spiritual Journey Through Creativity

Michelle Lesley

Discipleship for Christian Women


Childless Not By Choice Infertility Survivorhood


Innovating for the Future

Pee on the sticks

a real IVF story

Tricia Thirey

Choosing Joy in Every Moment


Exalting the name of Jesus through Christian essays

Cramping my Style

A 20 something girl suffering Endometriosis, documenting the glamour of day to day life with an invisible illness...

The Paralegal Society™

a forum created to educate, motivate and inspire paralegals to engage in the pursuit of excellence for all paralegalkind.

Colouring In My Life

From diagnosis to acceptance, with Endometriosis in between

Jesus and Coffee

Faith, family, beauty...we’ve got it all going on here!

Coffee Made Better

Stopping bad coffee.


"In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths." -Proverbs 3:6


Surviving with PCOS; my side of the story.

Waiting for the Bump

The Process of Starting a Family With the Help of Infertility

Rebecca’s World

Even miracles take a little time


Life as Mrs M 🌻💛

Ethical Grounds

The Unofficial Blog of Vermont's Bar Counsel

Journey of Restored Hope

Every person has a unique story to share and I would like to pass along my story in an effort to help others find hope in the darkest of places.

Tears in a Bottle

A safe haven for wounded hearts.

Insomnia Girl

and the Very Important Thoughts keeping her awake

Lallie Lee

Learning to Live Fearless

Boo Wholefoods

Eating the healthy way to keep endometriosis at bay.