Waiting Around

Hello, friends! I’m so glad that 2016’s here! I hope you all had a great new year!

Through the grace of God I made it through the holidays intact and sans homicide charges, and for that I’m extremely grateful. On Christmas Day DH and I loaded up the car with our swimsuits, dog, and a sack of Christmas presents (okay, and maybe a few other things) and embarked on our annual road trip to Florida to see the in-laws. It was a much-needed getaway that we apparently, like, really needed. The weather was fabulous, I got some color on my pasty self, I satisfied my palm tree fix (I seriously heart palm trees. Like, obsessively), and we ate way too much and way too well all week long.

After being gone for nine days I feel revived and ready to tackle a new year. 2016 WILL be great! This year I’ve resolved to rest, to make myself surrender these infertility woes each and every day to God and let Him do all my heavy lifting, to stay focused on our goal of pregnancy/baby but to go about it clearheaded and full of expectation. It’s a daily endeavor and, honestly, sometimes a total struggle to actively rest, but already the peace I feel is amazing. I pray the same for all of you: peace and rest and success.

My first post-miscarriage period showed up one week before our trip. Even though I was bummed to be having a period, I was grateful for its timing: my periods normally last 4 days and this one came 6 days before our trip. During a normal cycle this would mean AF was long gone by the time we got to Florida.

Ah, but this was no normal cycle.

We got to Florida on period day 8. I had this crazy idea that there was No Way this extra-long period could last much longer. But then—after 9 days of AF—horrible cramps inexplicably resumed and my period began ALL OVER AGAIN on day 10! I didn’t even know it was physically possible to have two periods literally back-to-back. At the end of it, I had a 14-day period (!) that lasted the entire trip. This was topped off by the mother of all migraines (I suffer from cyclical migraines like clockwork three days post-period). The day after we got home I was chained to my bed with a dizzying, light-intensifying, vomiting-inducing, head-crushing migraine. I’m so glad to be free of both evils now and back in the work/life grind, albeit feeling a little dizzy and drained from the process and my medication.

In the meantime DH and I are back at TTC. Since everything is still all screwy with my cycle, I decided to skip the OPKs this month. There’s still half a box of the expensive kind collecting dust under my bathroom sink: too expensive to waste on a non-normal cycle. DH and I are living like the Fertiles in the BD department this month instead and just hoping that our timing is on point.

Dr. C says that I have to have another hysteroscopy after my next period, so we’re just sort of hanging around waiting for that to happen. I can’t have my FET until I get this second h/s. I’m anxious to get started with the FET and to use our lone remaining embryo, but I think we should wait until springtime to do it. I won’t take the chance of winter weather screwing up anything: if a snowstorm or something happened that kept us from getting to the surgical clinic on transfer day (it’s kinda a long drive), we could lose our thawed snowbaby and have to start again from scratch. Even though waiting a few months is blahhhhh, I don’t think it’s worth the risk to start back right away.

Because of this limbo, I feel like I really don’t have much to write these days as far as IF stuff. So for now I’ll leave you with some pics from our vacation.

Author: Marixsa

Resolving infertility as childless-not-by-choice and encouraging fellow endo warriors along the way. View all posts by Marixsa