Biopsy: A Change of Plans

biopsy-under-microscope

Never one to wait, I cancelled my remaining two cervical cauterizations and went straight to uterine biopsy. The bleeding had become too much and too often so I wanted to rule out anything terrible, cause that’s just how I roll.

The Before

There’s just no way around it: biopsies hurt! Although it’d been 13 years since my last lady-parts biopsy (colposcopy), I still vividly remembered the searing pain of cells being scraaaaaaped away. *shudder*  However, since my uterus has seen lots of action since 2004—what with surgeries,  hysteroscopies, HSGs, pregnancies and the like—I hoped that, like a well-exercised muscle, it’d toughened itself up and the pain would be minimized.

So, onward I soldiered to my latest biopsy…. with the benefit of hindsight and armed with ‘narc painkillers. I like to think that maybe I’m getting smarter (just a little).

The During

Doctors have a funny way of measuring time: Dr. Maryland completely lied when she said it’d last “ten seconds.”  Don’t believe the hype, people!  Biopsies take a few minutes—REAL minutes, not doctor minutes.

There was pain. There was blood. There was tensing of my leg muscles as I gripped the edge of the exam table throughout the entire interminable procedure.

I was literally thanking God when it was over. Still am.

The After

And the results are in. 

 

*drum roll please*

 

I met with Dr. Maryland in person for my results. The appointment was brief:

  • Biopsy results were normal (anticlimactic, I know).
  • Intermenstrual bleeding is coming from my cervix, not my uterus.
  • While the bleeding is abnormal, there’s nothing that Dr. Maryland or any doctor I’ve met with can (or will) do about it. The only way to fully stop the bleeding is with hormones—i.e. birth control.
  • Dr. Maryland has no solutions for me and suggested I return to my RE and ART (even though I’ve told her umpteen times that ART isn’t something we want to pursue right now).
  • Then she “wished me luck” and said to call her when I get a positive pregnancy test.

I felt utterly dismissed. It was the closest someone’s ever come to saying, “I can’t help you. Now get out of here” without actually saying the words themselves.

The Finale 

One year later, the medical chapter of my unexplained bleeding ends, although the bleeding itself does not end.  I still have this crazy notion that there’s a doctor out there who can help me, but whoever she or is he, it eludes me.

Am I just chasing rainbows? Do I really “just have to live with it?” Is this my body’s new normal? After how much I had to fight just to get a simple biopsy performed, I feel pretty defeated. Normal results are so reassuring; lack of a solution, not so much.

When doors keep shutting like this, I believe it’s God trying to tell me something. Now onward to figure out what that something is. My hope in medicine is dashed; but thank God medicine isn’t the final answer. That’s the only thing I know for sure amid all this uncertainty.

*Chapter Ends.*

 

 

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Author: Marixsa

Navigating the infertility waters and encouraging other mamas-in-waiting along the way.

4 thoughts on “Biopsy: A Change of Plans”

  1. Oh no. Whilst I am glad there is nothing more nefarious at fault it is still an unsatisfying outcome.
    Is there a name for the condition? Perhaps if you googled the name with “treatment” next to it some other doctors names might pop up. Could something like acupuncture help? – That might seem really random, but my Aunt had vertigo so bad that she could not lay all the way down at night and no one could help her for a decade. As a last resort she went to acupuncture and it made a huge difference to her daily life.

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  2. I’m sorry, that all sounds really frustrating. I’m disappointed by your doctors lack of suggestions! Apart from googling it and looking for other women who went through the same thing to try to find a solution I don’t know what to suggest. Hoping things get better soon.

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  3. Omg! That’s sounds like a nightmare! You know I hope you find a resolution and then go back to your doctor and be like SO THERE!!! I mean that can’t just be it?! There cannot be no explanation. I want to come and shout at your doctor on your behalf. I love that you’re still staying strong. I wish I could say something comforting but in the absence of that I congratulate you on being entirely incredible about the whole thing. I cannot even imagine the mental fortitude you need to keep seeking answers. *hugs*

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